Thursday, May 31, 2012

Roles of Relationships: Men and Women


Roles of Relationships: Men and Women

Trouble is part of your life, and if you don't share it, you don't give the person who loves you enough chance to love you enough.  ~Dinah Shore

From the start of human time, affairs of love, romance flings, couples and emotional relationships there has always been a set of precise roles of gender that have grown and been active to this very day and have furthered from society’s advancements. 

Even though our world is being consumed by all things technology, a handful of issues will always remain unaltered, and the roles of relationship and the roles each partner plays in a relationship will remain unchanged.  When male and female are attracted to one another, it generally is the girl that provides the signal or light to the male that he may come forward and introduce himself.

Putting these courtship roles aside, and going into a situation in which guy and girl are being locked into each other’s lives routinely and not momentarily creates a system or roles, unconscious character like actions, that is intriguing and interesting to analyze when stepping away from the inside and viewing it as a spectator in a voyeuristic fashion.  It is like we become these characters not by choice but rather by that of human animalistic nature, as if we are programmed like a computer.  Roles of relationships.

The Role Perceptions

Regardless of whether these perceptions and viewpoints have been suggested by a female or hinted at by a female, they sort of just come into play for the male counterpart in the relationship.  Courteousness and Chivalry will always be a role that is present in time, and never outdated, no matter how far we advance in other areas of society.  The man must perspire this concept. 

Girls still enjoy the little things a gentleman has to offer like opening the car door, walking on the outside of her while strolling down the street, waiting for her food to arrive before you start eating, and so forth; gentleman type things.  Basically a gentleman is someone a lady like to keep for while and an arrogant prick is someone she likes to keep until something better comes along.

Now from the other side of the coin, men value and welcome women whom are composed gracefully in a calm and easy going fashion.  This is the type of woman that a man would like to bring home to meet his parents, but lets face it a man would still have loads of fun with a hot mess, but they don’t see it as anything permanent in most circumstances. 

Men tend have enormous egos and act territorial about their women, a lot don’t want a girl who has had more boyfriends or flings than can be counted on one hand.  It’s not whether that’s right or wrong, it just is how a lot men think.  On the other hand women generally don’t care as long as they get to be the last girl in their life.

Abundant Societal Beliefs

From the start of time, when Adam and Eve started fornicating there has been specific social norms that have continued throughout time such as that a man is supposed to provide for his family, and women should take care of the children.  Than there are some other norms that are becoming more flipped and sort of a role reversal type thing as society advances in time such as men paying for dinner dates, or girls waiting for guys to ask them out, these types of things have been changing and are not as strict as they once were.  Women generally wait much more patiently for their male counterpart, whereas if a man were to wait for his lady counterpart to finish with something, he would tend to garner a sense of impatience and squirm a bit.  These sorts of things circle the minds of people in relationships, like should I pay for dinner, why doesn’t he ever pay for dinner and so forth.

It’s sort of weird that society expects certain norms of relationships without questioning it, like if I am at dinner with a beautiful girl, just her and I.  When the bill comes, the waiter 9 out of 10 times will hand the bill to me, not questioning it but just instinctual.  If you break the mold society will snap at you for being different. 

A good example besides my dinner dates and the bills is if a very powerful career oriented woman screws up her marriage and get’s divorced, our world will tend to act a certain way.  The world society will end up pointing their fingers directly at the woman rather than judging both the man and lady equally at the damage of the marriage.

Now let’s flip it on the other side, if a man were to stay at home and take care of the kids and family, and be a sort of “house husband” society would probably disapprove.  Of course society would disapprove no matter what country you live in or what religion or language you speak, men are not supposed to stay home, we are told men must work and bring home the money, taking care of the children is a women’s job.  WRONG! But this is a role of relationships that we tend to follow without questions, you don’t have to be afraid to stop and question these roles.

What Actually Matters the Greatest

When two people are happy about themself and are qualified in fostering a healthy and blissful relationship, they will find out what matters most.  What actually matters the greatest is the joy of each partner and growth on a personal level.  Yes there are roles in relationships but if you and your partner choose to be different, do not let society standards bring you down or question your relationship as society is just a bystander.  Remember if you fall for the traps of society, and your relationship crumbles, society doesn’t suffer, you do. 

The roles of relationships are based upon what you two choose to do, and if you let society lead you down the road, and if it’s a road not of your choosing, you will most likely run into a dead end.  The most important role in a relationship is the ability to understand each other and to be on the same page with each other’s roles.  These roles in your relationship give one another purpose, and give each other specific responsibilities but you both have to be happy with these responsibilities for it to work out.  It is simple, just be clear and expressive in regards to what roles you choose in the relationship and are happy with choosing, otherwise arguments occur and your partner meets someone else waiting in the wind. 

Mike Ahuja




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